Bernie Bassett

Epic Fail Party

Clement Rhodes-Tone Holden’s successor, he steadfastly denies it was he who tipped off the NSA about his boss’s hidden mansion. Infacta, he says it was someone else entirely but can’t remember who exactly as he was betting on the geegees that day. Bassett was once famously described as a “devious little bollix” by an entire county, probably Louth. Bernie’s love for the horses was crucial in the mid-late noughties when he backed the entire country’s 2008 budget on a long shot in the 3.30 at Punchestown. The resultant recession though, really had nothing to do with him at all and the fact that the horse had only 3 legs can only be put down to some unfortunate advice from the tipsters, who obviously saw him coming. Pity the country didn’t.

Any Politician. Any Country. Same Bullshit.

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