Joanna Hand asked:

Dear Bernie Bassett,
How would you sum up your time in office?

Howya Joanna,

Well I’d usually have a cappuccino in the morning, play solitaire for a while and den check out Paddy Power dot com to check out de odds for whatever race meeting would be coming up. Dat would take me up to lunchtime.

Lunch itself isn’t important to your question as I don’t have it in the office. Normally, it’s out the bleedin’ door to the nearest and most expensive 5-star hotel for a slap up grill on de taxpayers’ tab.

De afternoon would generally be a repeat of the morning, except I’d probably have a shite between 3.30 and 5pm. I’ve built up a grand collection of Racing Post back issues in the old cubicle. Dat brings me nicely to the end of another hard day at the office.

Dat about sums it up I think,

Infacta,
Bernie